The E-mail

People, behold Chaotic Deception's Idiocy:


1) Below is my flame to her best friend called Compulsive Twitch (not only until yesternight did I realize that the latter's complex is Tourette's syndrome)

I beseech you to stop writing. No, really. You don't even know that putting author's notes in the middle of the story is not only rude, but apparently retarded.

You don't know how to write. Your punctuations, or lack thereof, are atrocious and so is your general grammar. And I guess I would just render myself redundant if I say that your spellings suggest a 3-year-old kid trying to scribble down some sense in a notepad, failing miserably.

And then, your OC is an effing Mary Sue. A stupid self-insert which is so easily transparent that all that's missing is a picture of you that says "I'm stronger than all the five Hokages put together." Maybe you could also add, "I can murder Kakashi with my great ball of chakra and send the whole Konoha crumbling down without lifting a finger." You know, I have a few suggestions to make: 1) why don't you shift this OC to a Dragon Ball Z fic so she wouldn't look so ridiculously strong? You must know that Itachi is the strongest of all Konoha shinobi and for this 12-year-old girl to beat him to a pulp, well, it's just plain inconceivable. 2) If you're really set on continuing this fic, kindly go to "edit stories" and change the genre into "parody". 3) If you're going to bash Kishimoto's characters, please get lost. And lastly, ERASE THIS PATHETIC EXCUSE FOR A FIC.

But then again, this fic is probably a JOKE. I take it as a joke, in fact, because I refuse to believe that someone who actually knows how to upload a story in ffn could be as retarded as this. I mean, don't pretend to be stupid. It's annoying. People are going through hard experiences and trials just so they wouldn't be called stupid, and then here you are trying to look cutesy-pie in this stupid fic of yours and begging the world to call you stupid just so they can call you cute. For the record, it doesn't make you look any better. It's an insult. You're an insult to my IQ.

Ja ne!

2) This is Chaotic Deception's reply to me:

... Okay. I have no complaints to you flaming my friend. I actually ENCOURAGE you to flame her. But you're a rookie flamer. If you flamed me, i would cry of LAUGHTER.

But of COURSE she's an insult to your IQ. You don't have one, so it's insulting that someone else does.

First of all, you flamed my friends FIRST story. NO ONE's first story is good.

SECOND OF ALL, do you even know what you WROTE!? I mean, reread your flames, all of them. And think. Is this really true? Or am i just typing down random insulting words so that this rookie writer will disappear into her sad little world?

Third- Author notes in the middle of a story indicate that the author actually CARES about her readers, and treats them as people, instead of just readers.

fourth- If you don't like something, DONT READ IT.

Fifth- Okay, Dana (AKA Compulsive Twitch) Did NOT put herself in her story. you don't know how she acts. She's the most ignorant, self concious, angry, hypocrite I know. And she also has a complex. Reread her fic, and tell me if the mary sue is anything, ANYTHING, like that brief description.

Go ahead. Flame me for telling you that not only you suck at flaming, reading, and reviewing, but writing as well. I tried reading one of your fics, and i couldn't get past the first sentence.

There's a little language you should learn about. It's called ENGLISH.

Sorry if i'm being rude, but reading your reviews and your profile, i can tell that you're rude all the time, and i admire your guts.

Unlike most though, your guts contain no glory. Flaming people, just for the sake of flaming, is NOT COOL.

-Chaotic Deception

P.S.- LEARN HOW TO FLAME.


3) And this, dear people, is my immediate comeback. I went easy on her as I know her intelligence, or utter lack thereof, wouldn't be able to handle it.

I wonder why someone who apparently can't USE apostrophe can say that I need to learn English. Please, your profile is ridden with grammatical errors. If you can spot one on mine, I'd give you extra credit.

Let's see. I understand that your best friend is a RETARD, and that's what I said in my flame. Something wrong with being completely honest? Please, stop contradicting your pathetic self.

Tell me though, HOW DO YOU FLAME? Do you pull up some cowardly, cheap comeback like this? Throwing everything back to me when you yourself know that Twitch's Mary Sue is herself? You said she has a complex, that she's a hypocrite, ignorant and for some abnormal reason, self-conscious (though it's amazing how a person can be self-conscious and yet IGNORANT. Hahaha. She should be in a circus!). Her Mary Sue, however, is nothing like that. For your information, a Mary Sue doesn't necessarily--in any way--resemble the person who created her. A Mary Sue, if you don't already know, is someone's dream self. I bet Twitch's dream self couldn't be a retard like her. Hahahaha. Tell me, is your Mary Sue a retard like you? Birds of the same feather flock together. Now I know why people who can't write, people like you, stay together to make an army of attention whores who can't use punctuations.


About my flame. I wouldn't actually call it something that sucks. If you read closely, I stated the things which I find lacking/wrong in her fic. Number 1) the absence of punctuations; Number 2) putting author's notes in the middle of the story and lastly, the spellings and the entire grammar even. Her spellings can't even beat my 6-year-old sister's. Her grammar is way below mine when I was just a fetus. Hey, do you want me to MST her work/crap so I can point out to you the horrible mistakes? You can't seem to figure out her mistakes because you're also a pitiable moron.


Come on, don't pretend that you're not DYING of anger when I flamed your friend. Please, don't struggle to keep your cool by saying you have nothing against me. The mere fact that you blared at me with this PM is a clear testimony that you have everything against me. As a matter of candid fact, you seem more affected by the flame than Twitch herself. Why, do you resemble her UGLY fic and you're so mad at me for calling it ugly because you yourself are just as ugly?


If my flame sucks, why don't you contradict it? Prove to me that I'm wrong in most of the points I tackled. For example, I said that placing author's notes in the middle of the story is innappropriate; for your part, why can't you conduct a survey among all writers/reviewers/readers you know regarding whether or not A/N's in the middle of the story are okay? Or better yet, prove to me that Twitch uses correct grammar. Or that her OC is not a Mary Sue when she already admitted so herself.


So Twitch is treating her readers as humans (NOT JUST MERE READERS) when she puts those nasty A/N's? More like, she's patronizing them, she's treating them like retards who are so puzzled by the way the story goes. Do writers put A/N's in the middle of the story? Look around the best writers in that category. Do they place A/N's everywhere? I would accept if Twitch's A/N's were moderated. No, but they screamed very much like, 'I need attention. Give it to me! Ain't I cute?' It's so pathetic.


As for my works...God! Look up the meaning of the following words in the dictionary: PARODY and SARCASM. If you've read the reviews for my story 'For What it Takes', some more intelligent people there REALIZED that it was a parody, meaning, it satirized crappy, amateurish works by IMITATING them. Savvy? If I didn't get that across to you, maybe you can watch Mad TV or Saturday Night Live. That's where they make fun of people by imitating them.


It just occurred to me that you don't know what 'criticize' means. Honey, you didn't criticize my flame/works/reviews. You just said they suck without even backing your statement up. Unlike my flame (which tells why Twitch's story sucks), your PM to me is one insecure, pointless, irrationally put rubbish. The moment you say that someone's work sucks, you must entail your declaration by giving out the reasons why it sucks. And that, dear, is how a group of words becomes a criticism. I knew it; you're one dumb platypus that eats planktons.


So come on, say that this reply sucks. I know that's the only comeback you're capable of. Say that I don't know English language when here I am, pleading you to grow a brain and use the language correctly. If you're so good and you're so much better than me, why don't you ask Twitch to, like, have you as her beta-reader. Then again, you yourself can't use an apostrophe so there's no use.


For the record, I can give you a link to some people's first stories that DON'T suck. That's because they knew grammar when they first uploaded their fics. Evidently, you and your friend are among the unfortunate group of people who suck the first time around. Too bad.


4) And I very much want to ask why she would call her best friend ignorant and hypocritical. To my mystification, she calls Twitch her best friend. Lady, have you no friends or what? Don't you know what 'friend' is?


And oh, didn't you say you encourage me to flame Twitch? Then why, oh why, did you tell me that if I don't like the story (which apparently is the case), then DON'T read it? Are you stupid or a fetus? You CAN'T flame people if you haven't read their stories. Please, don't ask me to do one thing and then simultaneously ask me to do another, which is an entirely different thing. Ha! You're so stupid. You don't even know that flames are meant to be rude. You probably just haven't heard of the term constructive criticism. I really pity you now. BAKA!